An Adoption Voyage Full Of Grace, Patience And A Whole Lot Of Love
Our adoption journey has not been easy, nor has been a happy-go-lucky adventure I had pictured when we first began the “voyage”. We began our adoption journey in August 2012 and I thought for sure we would have a little one in our arms by Christmas 2012….who was I kidding?! I thought it was going to be this positive, happy experience and didn’t even consider the pain and suffering associated with adoption. After 2 long years of tears, patience, pain, and a whole lot of love, it has all become clear. Here is our story…
After years of infertility and doctors having no clue why we couldn’t get pregnant, we prayed and decided that God had other plans for us. It is amazing how clear it becomes when you place all that you have in His hands. In August 2012, we started with a local agency and began our first steps of background checks, home visits, and gathering references from our family and friends. It was all very exciting and we were certain we would be picked right away…haha, I laugh it this now!
Another step we took, now that a family of three was in our near future, was we started to be serious about finding a church. We had been “shopping” around for one since we were married, but hadn’t settled on just one. We finally found one that matched our love of missions and fit with our views of faith. Our church family and friends had become the backbone and support we needed during this crazy ride we were about to embark on.
Fast forward 18 months later, after many prayers of continued patience and a drama filled failed adoption locally we decided to go ahead and sign on with
. This was a hard decision, because it felt as if we had failed again. We couldn’t get pregnant on our own, we couldn’t get pregnant with all advances in fertility treatments and now we were failing yet again at adoption with our local agency…how can this be?! I think it is safe to say we were beginning to have a hard time staying patient and faithful. Although, HE is faithful and when we finally put it in HIS hands, it became so very clear (and after a lengthy phone call with Dawn ) We signed on with CAC in April 2014.
It might be an understatement to say we were eager. We said yes, to almost every case that came through our email and we were starting to feel comfort that our baby was coming soon. God’s grace is an amazing thing. It is hard to describe what grace feels like…kind of like a warm blanket on a cold winter night or a hug from a loved one you haven’t seen in a while. We just knew that God was in control and we had nothing to worry about. After a brief mis-match in early June, we finally thought we found the “one”! The one we knew God intended for us, we knew it after our first phone conversation with our son’s birthmother. However, we were still very cautious and we guarded our hearts for the possibility of another heartbreak. Although through it all, we continued to have faith that our little one was near.
After an army of prayers from family and friends, our son was placed in our arms on July 24, 2014 at 7:16 pm. We are quite positive that we have never prayed as hard or as much in our lives as we had on our journey to Arizona. We prayed for grace and peace for his birth mother and hoped our words and actions confirmed to her how blessed and grateful we felt for this absolutely beautiful gift. She is an amazing women and we were blessed to have spent some time with her and her family hours before and after our son was born. It is a time in our lives that will never be forgotten.
As I reflect on our voyage to find our son… the crazy, long, and difficult ride, it was all worth it. The tears, the heartache, the absolute despair we felt...all worth it! I promise you, when you give it ALL to him, he brushes you with a peaceful hand and a reassuring heart that your time will come. People often say, “I could never go through what you have been through” or “You guys are so strong”. Our response is that it isn’t just us. We are not alone. Without Him we could not have survived it all. It is because of Him we found our way and was able to feel the absolute LOVE of HIM and the LOVE for OUR child. God is always good and is always faithful. Through this process of adopting our son, our faith, love for one another, and patience has grown to place unimagined or dreamt. I now can see why God took us on this voyage and as I look into my son’s eyes and his absolutely perfect smile it is all too clear. He was always ours and we were always his…we just had to wait.